i love the numerical certainty of fevers. you catch it today, incubation lasts about 2 days (2.3? 2.1? who knows) and you find yourself sick. i blame zero and luthien (haha!) but i really blame the weather. unseasonally hot, my lips are parched and the air-conditioning isn’t helping much. everything’s cast in a golden yellow glow. i feel the heat radiating off the curtains, like the heat radiating off my forehead.
a friend of mine’s come up with a business idea and it looks interesting. it has potential because quite a bit of the business side is taken care of, leaving us to deal with the inventoring and the purchase of goods. it needs some thought, and i’m already feverish.
i woke up today with a promise i.e. that i’d be calm. i’ve been listening to lush99.5 so i’ve got myself pretty calmed down, now enjoying the forced lassitude brought on by a couple of panadols. as i type this, i receive an email on the system - a goodbye email from a long-time administrator in Ipoh. i don’t find it amusing anymore, and it doesn’t have the same corroborative value stuff like that would have had a year or so ago.
those were days for fighting against the system. not anymore, i suppose. a big meeting is scheduled tomorrow to discuss the things that were raged about via our collective emails. of course, i had to be the mutinuous fletcher christian: weak, stupid and almost half-used, i suppose.
things, however, have a certain momentum that builds up when things are left unchecked. i’m not apologizing for myself, no: but it wasn’t just me. if i were my employer, i’d give me the sack. and frankly, i couldn’t give less of a damn than i do now. the fever has something to do with that, i’m sure.
just today, we got wind of another big client; did i say ‘wind’? i meant ’stink’. that’s got our bosses busying themselves. and sure enough, tomorrow’s meeting looks like it’s not going to happen. i don’t know if i should feel thankful or not: thankful because it’s just one more reason to step out on my own, and not thankful because we really need to have our say in the larger scheme of things.
who cares? i don’t.
